When I hung up the phone after leaving a message on someone's voice mail today, my husband (who I didn't know was listening) said to me, “You want to know something I really like that you do?” Intrigued, and more than a little bit excited by the mysterious and unexpected feedback, I said, “Yea, I do!”
“Whenever you get off the phone, even if you are just leaving a message, you say ‘GOODbye'. You never say ‘bye' or ‘bye bye', you always say the whole word, ‘GOODbye' (emphasis and upswing on the first half of the word).
I felt really good, hearing that from him. I loved it that the feedback was positive, of course, but it was even more than that. It was such a little thing to notice, the way I say goodbye on the phone. I think that's what I loved most about it. I felt so… well, noticed. At the risk of being dramatic, I'd even say I felt known, like he gets me. Because I care about the way I communicate so much and that he was paying attention to this thing that matters so much to me was really validating.
This made me think about how this applies to so many scenarios – noticing the little things. From mentioning that you read your client's latest blog post to showing your audience in a presentation that you identify with them by sharing a personal story that reflects their own experiences. When my husband noticed the way I say goodbye on the phone, I felt really good and connected to him. That's the way we want to feel with other human beings – in marriage, of course, but really in all parts of life.
What little thing can you notice and share today so that one person feels the connection between the two of you more powerfully?